Can we stop hearing about downtown parents who dress their babies in black skull slippers, Punky Monkey T-shirts and camo toddler ponchos until the little ones end up looking like sad-parody club clones of mom and dad? Can we finally stop reading about the musical Antoinettes who would get the vapors if their tykes were caught listening to Disney tunes, and who instead force-feed Brian Eno, Radiohead and Sufjan Stevens into their little babies’ iPods?Whoa, dude, you've got to relax! What have you got against hummus, my friend?
I mean, don’t today’s much-discussed hipster parents notice that their claims to rebellious individuality are undercut by the fact that they are fascistically turning their children into miniature reproductions of their hipper-than-thou selves? Don’t they observe that with their inevitable hummus snacks, their pastel-free wardrobes, their unearned sense of superiority and their abusively pretentious children’s names like Anouschka and Elijah, they are displaying a degree of conformity that makes your average suburban cul-de-sac look like Renaissance Florence?
Enough already. The hipster parent trend has been going on too long and it’s got to stop.
I'm inclined to just give this one a big "different strokes for different folks" rebuke.
Then again, I'll just say this...unfortunately, Dave, we can't all pull off the pink button down look as well as you can, my friend. Just leave the hipsters be.
(Btw, this post has prompted me to start a new blog post label - below - can you guess which one it is?...:))